Five Easy Ways to Vent Safely
Have you ever had one of those days where everything was going wrong? You missed a deadline, you lost a good client, an oft-promised cheque still hasn’t arrived, final notice on your cable bill came today, the client isn’t buying into the concept, your spouse is upset, your dog has fleas, and to top it all off – you just dropped your bread, and it landed butter side down. Worst Monday ever.
Here are 5 tips to help you blow off some steam before you climb up to the bell tower.
- Me Time – Go for a walk, go have a coffee, get extra sprinkles on an ice cream, whatever. Take 30 minutes for yourself. You’ll be amazed at how hard it is to explode when you’re halfway through a peanut buster parfait. Unless you’re allergic to peanuts.
- Buddy up – Before you get to the worst day ever, find a friend/coworker/distant relative and make an agreement to allow each other to vent – occasionally. Having someone that can listen and understand can help you refocus on your priorities. And hearing someone else whinge and whine about their piddly problems can be cathartic.
- Shout it out – Find a safe and quiet location – quiet as in no one can hear you, not quiet as in your local library – and then let it out. Hoot, holler, yell, cry, scream, speak in tongues. Say what’s on your mind until you can’t say anymore.
- Write it down – Write an email to yourself. CAUTION – write it to you, and to you alone. Make sure your name is the only one in the “to” field. Pour everything into the email. Construct cohesive thoughts, and organize your frustrations from terrible to horrible. Read this email. Do not save this email. Delete this email – do not send this email. If your email client has a self destruct option, blow up this email. This can be applied to any of your favourite communication channels – but like Thursday says in her recent article – be careful of burning bridges.
- Take inventory – Sure, everything sucks today. But you still get to live in a nice place, and you’re going to be able to find more clients. Make a list of all of the great things in your life. Like reading FreelanceSwitch every day – does it get better than this?
I’m sure exercise works for many of you, but I think I’ve been clear on my beliefs around that topic. What do you do to blow off some steam?
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These are great tips! It is never healthy to keep anger bottled up.
Excellent post and perfect timing. I was up until 3 last night because I was so angry at this client. I have been doing my craft for over 10 years and this guy is on my top five for worst clients ever. I haven’t been this mad in a Long long time.
I was just thinking, I need to learn how to vent. I really need to learn how to let things slide out of my mind. To know I am in the right; my contract and the paper trail prove I’m right, and yes, they are the jerk.
Least the guy paid today.
Great points Jason.
I take time out and prefer to be alone at these times. But some have a better result by being with friends and family.
Kindest,
Nabeel
A very nice list, I may have to take a few key points to heart…
When I have one of those days I say “fuck it”
I drop what ever i have in my arms, and i take a bottle of nice wine and share it with my woman.
Getting everything in a distance. I cant provide decent work to the other clients anyway if im in a bad mood. My mood sets my creativity.
So spending an hour or two with people I love usually does the trick.
If no one is available, I turn on a movie or a game or someting else that can take my attention 100% so i forget about the frustration.
Works like a charm. And I can get back to my clients with new renewed creativity and passion for my craft.
trying to “suck it up” and just ignoring it newer works for me.
Agreed. Especially the wine part… good philosophy!
Great list of safe ways to vent. I like to exercise my frustration out.
I tend to go outside, lean against a wall, and brood. Brood until it hurts to frown any longer.
When it comes to emotional outbursts I’ve grown accustomed to just phasing out, drift away in thought until other things fill my mind.
Remember when it was cool to not care about all the setbacks in your life? Believe in your ability to play the ‘cool’ card, believe in yourself to mend the situation in dignity and you may be able to bend your state of mind to a less volatile state.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1041316/
“Penn & Teller: Bullshit!” Anger Management (2007)
And while doing all of this, always keep in mind to never EVER vent through social media. Ever.
Yup. I just talked to a guy about that today. He simply wouldnt listen.
Always remember that Expressing yourself on a online forum etc is the same as standing in the middle of your city and expressing your oppinion with a megaphone.
haha so true, I wrote a similar post on my blog the other day about what needs to be done with pent up frustration.
I like to listen to the secret agent station on somaFM and feel awesome. Totally centers me.
By the way, I laughed my ass off when I read this. I wish everyone was talking about how funny it is.
Good one Jason your articles are getting so interesting nowadays that i look forward to read it…keep posting…nice well summed up tips it happens to me a lot
I find that if you don’t vent, it prevents you from thinking clearly… so if you’re angry or frustrated you can’t work things out when you need to, it puts a red wall right in the middle of your creative road. Go for a walk or have a cuppa and watch Trisha (I only use her as an example here, I’m not suggesting for one moment you watch this kind of trash telly
) The idea being you give yourself a break and focus on something completely different. Works for me (not the Trisha bit though 
.
Basically if you’re like me…i.e. “Mr McGee, don’t make me angry, you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry”… then you really do need a distraction… otherwise the eyes turn green and you rip another shirt… and being a freelancer I can’t afford the shirts!!
Good tips, for me, it generally end up with a laugh.Things will get arranged soon and yes they are!
A colleague of mine is moving a brand new corporate website to another server. In the process the host support has made a right royal m*ck-up of moving the files — only 70 Mb in total but Murphy’s law still applies right down to the last tiddly bit. There have been delays upon delay, loads of fiddly things got broken and have had to be fixed. My poor colleague aka webmaster has worked through the weekend (again) and has been brought to boiling point several times over. Thank goodness we’re buddies. I can’t do much for him on the web-techy front but I’m there if he wants/need to vent steam behind the scenes. Not a good idea to bottle up all this frustration, and it sure helps him having a safe space to blow up in, far better than blowing up the website (or the so-called host support team)!
I think to be on the safe side it would be better to send yourself a letter, rather than an email. Its a lot more easier for ‘that’ email to be sent to the wrong people than it is for you to accidently send something in the post.
I recommend singing.
If you are mad, find some angry songs and sing and dance and shout along. Hasn’t failed me yet.
Thank you Jason.
It just happens to be this kind of day for me… Read the post made me feel better.
This article could not have had better timing. Just went through a horrible Monday yesterday and still dealing with the fallout. Love your peanut buster parfait idea — I have a DQ in walking distance. Thanks for the timely advice!
Did you read my diary or something? This post was written for me! Bookmarked and featured this post in my Tweets of the Week! http://bit.ly/aP30Aa
I like to write my frustrations into the google searchbar. It still feels like its going somewhere into the collective consciousness, and when I hit enter, I always find that I am not at all alone =)