Why I Kicked “Resolutions” to the Curb for 2010
It’s 2010 and everyone is off to a fresh start. It feels fabulous. Each new year is a great time to start new and think about where you are headed. But if you think that involves having to make a resolution, think again. You can still accomplish great things without having a “resolution.”
In years past, I’ve always had a resolution. In 2007, it was to publish my book. Check. In 2008, it was to query magazines. Check. So this year, I was all ready to focus on one fabulous career resolution, and then I started thinking about it. In truth, I was tired of setting goals. I was tired of pushing myself. I push enough. Maybe, I thought, it was time to try another method and take it easy on myself.
It’s not that I don’t think we need goals, but hear me out: If you’re an overachiever or a workaholic, you probably don’t need a resolution. Chances are if you’re like me, you do pretty well at setting goals and achieving them. So why not set another one? Why not continue the tradition like everyone else and feel great when you reach your mark?
For me, not setting a resolution was all about focusing on what I really need to do with my business, and in my personal life…which is chill out a little. I trust that I’ll do the things I want to. And to make sure that I am on target with where I am and where I want to be, I did a little self-assessment. I thought about the things I wanted. Things that may fall into a resolution. I just took away the pressure and told myself that, sure, I would love to write another book this year or get published in more magazines, but I’m already on the right path. I’ll get there. I don’t need to strive and strive and kill myself getting there.
Giving Yourself the Beatdown…and Knowing When to Stop
I used to beat myself up when I didn’t have time to work on my book and magazine writing. But then i realized that although I don’t always have the time to do that, I am running a thriving copywriting business. My bills are paid and money is being saved. That’s pretty good!
The big-picture things I want to accomplish in life are already happening. Sure, I want to continue them, but I also want to enjoy being a freelancer. I want to take an afternoon off and not push myself to write more. I want to devote time to other aspects of my life. It’s all about balance. (Isn’t everything?) Overall, I trust where I am going. Things may not happen on my timeline, but I know I am a go-getter and I’ll make them happen in time.
No Goal, No Win?
I did think that without something to look to like a firm resolution, I may not accomplish the tasks I wanted to. But then I remembered that simply by being aware of my goals was enough for those of us that are very driven. And if it wasn’t, I could still use the tools that helped me accomplish tasks in the past.
This may not work for everyone else, but simply by checking in, I think that will help. Check in, and check in often. I’ll be writing to stay aware of my career this year. A few times a month, I intend on writing about where I am headed in my career–sans the pressure. I may post images to remind me to work on my book and magazine queries, but I’m not going to beat myself up if those things don’t come to be by Dec. 31, 2010. Maybe it’s because these goals aren’t so pressing. By all means, if you have something huge that you want to accomplish this year, set a resolution. Go all out and make a strategic plan. Push yourself. It’s not a bad thing.
But if you’re a natural self-pusher, you may not need all the pressure. You can still be aware of where you want to go. If you like where you are headed with your business, it’s okay to simply enjoy the ride.
Freelancing is all about getting to know yourself. If you’re not self-motivated, that’s okay. It just happens to be that many of us are. And if you want a change from the norm, take a year off to try something new. It doesn’t mean you can’t stay focused on where you are and where you’re going, it just means that you will do your best to give your inner critic a 12-month vacation.
Kristen – I hear where you’re coming from. But for me, I’ve found that if I don’t set goals (I prefer to set goals rather than resolutions), I get off track. So I need them.
However, I also understand what you mean about pushing yourself too hard. So what I started doing last year was to set only ONE goal in each of the 5 key areas of my life. Forcing myself to choose only one goal in each area was tough. But it took a LOT of the stress out. Plus, I added one more area to set a goal for. I call it my “fun” goal. This takes some of the seriousness out of the process and gets me even more motivated to continually work on all my goals.
Six goals total works for me. It’s less stressful yet it keeps me focused.
You now have a job.
So your goal is to have no resolutions =)
Hey, great post. I just had a Twitter convo. with Freelance Switch re. resolutions … you can read it here:
http://twitter.com/DLDesign/status/7409380863
My reason for giving up on NY resolutions is for quite the same reasons you outline in your post, with the added notion that we should be setting ourselves new goals every day, every week, every month, every hour – it should not happen once a year only in the form of a ‘I have to get my stuff in gear’ (and then you don’t – come on – be honest with yourself).
Set small attainable goals regularly and you will be surprised how easy it is to move forward, instead of constantly spinning around in circles.
Wow! It is so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one out there setting this sort of resolution. This year my plan is to focus less on acheiving things and more on appreciating what I’ve already accomplished. I spend so much time/energy striving for -killing myself for- a goal and then when I get it, it’s as if it no longer matters and I set a new goal which I’m then fixated on. I was never satisfied despite having accomplished all sorts of great things. I’ll still be moving in the right direction, but without all the presure and stress. I, like you, am going to try to enjoy the ride.
I’ve done something similar as you, I don’t feel like entering a new year requires new goals or resolutions. I always have my goals in mind and constantly strive to work towards completing them, so there should never be an issue to revisit my goals in the new year!
I always feel a little deflated in January, and part of the reason is that I am constantly reviewing and setting new goals, striving and pushing myself to do more and to do better. Chris Brogan wrote about having 3 words that serve as guiding principles rather than setting specific goals; that might be a good alternative for people who are particularly driven. Nice post.
I just started a new way to purge those bad feelings so that they don’t get to me while I work…cause i’ve realized that personally I need to mentally let go of troubles in order to benefit my business progression…
Setting goals for me, help me to stay on track and keeps me focused on where i want to go.
How about making a resolution for the greater good? twitter.com/changethinkers is giving away $250 to non-profit of your choice if you come up with the best new year’s resolution for social good.
I don’t think goal thing is an either-or thing. It’s not a “kill yourself or do nothing” proposition. To me, it’s all about keeping perspective at all times. It’s about picking the right goals for the right reasons. If I take the time to do that, I won’t feel empty inside at the end of the year.
I guess my feelings toward goals are best summarized by what the late Jim Rohn once said…
“The real value of setting a goal is the person you become in the pursuit of that goal.”
So true! You have to become “worthy” of the goal in order to achieve it. Which means you grow personally and professionally. When I approach it that way, I feel very fulfilled, and I get to enjoy the ride.
I agree with you.
I pushed my sefl too much in the past and i didn’t have a life.
It was all frustration.
Being greed for work and career doesn’t bring anything good.
I work to live better and enjoy my life. I don’t live because i have to work all the time and push my self too hard everyday.
I totally agree – this is a great article.
Glad to get people talking and thinking productively!
My “resolutions” are: grow a beard and apply for an LLC.
I’m sort of the exact opposite. I am motivated and goals help focus that motivation.
Goals are only a part of it it’s all about being focused and taking action on the right things daily that really matter and make what you want happen.
The thing is, we’re all different. Some people need goals, others don’t. With all the talk of goals, I just wanted to let people know that they may not need them.
All the best in 2010!!!
I agree with this completely. I wrote a blog post on it (http://www.timwoods.org/2009/05/09/goalism-the-dark-side-of-target-setting/) basically talking about the same thing.
I have a different approach to setting my targets for the new year. It’s more about taking some time to step back and notice what I was glad I did in the year that just passed. And then, and only then, approaching the setting of new targets (based on that new knowledge). http://www.timwoods.org/2009/12/26/writing-resolutions/ The idea is that we’re always moving toward the things we actually enjoy doing and that make us feel fulfilled. I used to dread goals, but now I feel like they’re a good way to make sense of my year.