I feel your pain. I have a 9-5, and freelance on the side. I took the 9-5 (doing tech support) so that I would have an in with an awesome company that I can move up in, doing design work in the Marketing Dept, or that may pay for me to go back to school to finish my degree in programming.

Thank you for writing this. Indeed, this is often the unglamorous side of freelancing that many do not see looking from the outside. You DO work longer hours. You DO have more responsibility. You DO have more weight on your shoulders to try to make your clients happy. You are a simply a business owner. And any business owner I know who owns a coffee shop or small store–they work overtime. I think it’s just the same with freelancing.

All to say that you had better love the trade to work all those extra hours.

Personally, freelancing is a means to an end. Part time its a great way to make good cash in short periods of time–its good for accompanying income. I suppose I’m saying I just don’t love it enough to become a business owner. Especially when I will have to soon worry about health insurance and steady income.

This article is a downer. I thought this place was about inspiring people?

Logan:

Thank you for having the courage to write this. Freelancing isn’t for everybody and part of making it work for you is realizing what works for YOUR life.

Don’t feel bad about not wanting to forge your own path; about what many of us long-time freelancers term a “cubicle dweller.” However, as long as you’re “stuck” freelancing, do try to make it work for you. Set more limits on the number of hours you work. That means giving clients realistic deadlines, charging more so you have to work less and paying attention to your body clock (this took me years to learn).

Although I occasionally get up at 7am and do marketing, I just don’t think before 10am. My brain literally won’t function. So, I get up at a later hour and work later in the evenings, which works better for not only my body clock, but my lifestyle.

I believe the travails of life teach us powerful lessons to help us carve out the life that was meant for us — not what society deems acceptable.

Good luck in your freelancing — and landing that well-paying job with benefits if that’s what you so desire.

Yuwanda

Wow. Reading this, I knew it had to be written by an actual new, struggling freelancer–just rings of too much truth! Furthermore, I’m almost in the exact same situation: A new freelancer, twice laid off in recent years, and struggling to become better at this “freelancing thing” before my savings runs out and I have to go crawling back to the “rat race.” Surely only to find that there are no more jobs for me anyhow!

Which is just as well, because there’s absolutely NO security in a job these days. (My last employer was owned by a retail “conglomerate” who ‘relocated’ the company’s headquarters, effectively laying off 80% of that workforce.)

So Logan, I know it’s tough–I’m right out here with ya. But I hope you’re able to keep at it for a little while longer, because I do believe it will pay off. (For both you AND me!)

By the way, Logan. Have you exercised lately?

I think this article was great and I don’t think it was a downer at all. I think it was realistic. Freelancing is not always going to go well and it depends on your point in life. When you are responsible for the well-being of other people (Wife and children), a 9-5 is a great thing in my opinion.

But you need to work with good people and the company culture needs to be inline with your own. I have a 5 minute drive to work for 9am, I come home from 12-1pm to spend time with my wife (Who is a stay-at-home mom) as well as my 16 month old. I’m home every night by 5:15 and can go for a walk through the park and down the street. When I go to work, I can spend my time accomplishing things in a different environment. It’s a second life and one that does not need to interfere with your home life.

Freelancing is tricky. It’s a challenge but the rewards can be very good, both financially and spiritually.

A 9-5 can be equally and better financially rewarding, you have access to a team of professionals and can rely on them. But you gotta work when everyone else is working and working in your PJ’s is not likely acceptable. It’s part of being a team. Sort of like sports… You can’t all show up whenever you want to… that’s not what being a team is about.

Oh yes, and as for the time spending? My 9-5 allows me the luxury of not only spending time, but spending QUALITY time with my wife and little girl. I don’t think about work once I leave the office… not often anyways

Thanks for the comments all.

To allow me to clarify, I certainly don’t want my bitching and moaning to deter anyone from pursuing freelancing full time. I know that I got into this situation due to a lack of education. I didn’t know what going rates were and I didn’t have any rudimentary knowledge on business management. And in my desperation for cash I turned into a freelancing slut: I never said no. Every project from referral I got, no matter how low paying, I agreed to, without negotiation. If you are reading this blog you will probably never get into this situation because you will know how to avoid these very simple mistakes.

I’m not quite sure to to react to having my life described as a “downer.” I’m doing better than some people I knew from high school, and even if I have no life, not having to deal with a boss is nice. And honestly, things are getting better. Yesterday I even got to take half the day off, and the fact that I can steal enough time to type this out certainly means things are changing for me.

@Rongen
Every evening when it’s bed time, I like to do the 50 meter “I don’t want to go to bed” kid chase, if that counts.

@Skellie
“(obviously) a talented writer”

Aw shucks, you’re making me blush.

Anyone who works 100 hours a week is an idiot. That’s 14 hours a day for seven days. Ridiculous. If you’re working that much, plain and simple, you’re doing everything wrong. So I wouldn’t be looking to those people as a yardstick. Or, rather, I’d be looking at them and thinking how well I’m doing, working as little, in comparison, as I do.

I’ll admit that when I was younger I felt there were a certain amount of bragging rights to working that hard. But now I see how perverse a way that is to look at things.

I wonder what your hourly rate is, and if you feel you need to work long hours to make the money you need. I wonder if you are grossly underestimating the time it takes to complete projects, and therefore constantly going over on time, and effectively reducing your hourly rate. I wonder how much you’re procrastinating. I’m wondering about the false economies that may be locking you down. Those were the mistakes I made and still sometimes do.

I’m lucky in that my business went into overdrive just about the time my daughter arrived. But I also remember being really scared by her arrival and basically deciding that, going forward, I needed to make a LOT more money than I had been. Previously myself and my wife could be said to have led a student-like existence: making okay money without working too hard, enough for rent and restaurants, a little entertainment, health insurance, but not enough for savings and, in fact, creeping consumer debt. Having a nipper changed all that. I made a set of decisions over the course of a year that kicked my business up to the next level: specializing, time tracking and analysis, significant rate increases. I didn’t lose one client, and gained a bunch of new ones.

Money is still a concern. We’re just about to buy a house. We still have some consumer debt. We just bought a second car. Etc. But money will always be a concern. Money is a concern for billionaires. If you can find a way to cut off from work for a chunk of the day—i.e. have a life beyond work—you’ll feel much better, even if your situation doesn’t change. (And then, of course, it will change.) If you think daycare is expensive, how expensive is it for you not to be earning? Should a guy who makes $60 or $80 or $100 an hour be doing childcare (if he doesn’t want to)?

Success only happens to those who are lucky… just ask any failure.

If you are really working that much, you need to phase in higher rates and commit to stopping work at 7pm (or earlier preferably). As a followup to this article, I want to see some goal setting, priority adjustments and a plan to end this madness. Are you doing this for minimum wage or do you need to earn a fortune in order to pay for high rent, car, college loan? If it is the latter, you need to move or cut back. Are you spending a lot of time unproductively? Get focused and set some parameters. For example: 9am - 10am = email, phone and news surf, 10am - noon = write with phone off the hook and no email, noon - 1am = lunch, 1pm - 5pm = more writing with no email, 5pm - 5.30pm = email, phone. Then quit for the day. I know that it sounds easier than it is and it will take some time but surely it is worth it.

But you know all of this, don’t you? Don’t miss these years of your daughter’s (or your own) life. I really feel for you, I have been locked into that sort of mess from time to time as well. I also struggle with organization and too often rely on hard work and talent to succeed. You gotta get a system. It sounds anti-creative but really the system takes care of the business and leaves room for you to be creative. I can tell you that your current schedule will not last. If you don’t do something to change it, something else will change it for you… sickness, burnout, family problems, etc. Better to do it now than be forced to under more unpleasant circumstances. A better life is not waiting around the corner unless you make it happen. (or win the lottery, which I actually recommend as the first option. all this other stuff is backup)

I truly wish you the best of luck.

I’m always curious about people who don’t have insurance because “they don’t have a FT job with benefits” or something like that. i’ve had my own insurance for years, i’ve even turned down insurance offered by companies b/c i would still have to chip in more than i pay now, for less coverage. I know that some people have medical histories that make insurance hard to get, but what about everyone else? Logan, shouldn’t you at least be able to get yourself insurance, at the very least?

I know exactly how you feel,
I have been feeling this way this week, after several 3am nights. As much as I don’t follow my own advice, sleep makes you work far more productively, and make better decisions.
Hope it all comes good for you. I’m sure it will. Good luck

Great article. It speaks from the other side of the coin, a perspective we all need sometimes.

Contact me. I can always use another writer. It’s freelance, but a chance to make more money (I pay well).

Hi Gezprila, do you think is time to write your experience in freelanceswitch so we can learn from your mistakes? I would be a great thing for the community.

Thanks

Thank you for your bravery in posting this! I know exactly where you are. Been there, done that. At the end of last year I was mentally, emotionally, and physically worn out after slogging through ungodly hours and intensive writing sessions. I found myself at a point where I didn’t even enjoy writing anymore. It became rote mundane habit, instead of a joy. I finally made the decision to take a month-long break. That break was extended, and then I decided I needed to get my priorities back in order. Now I’m back in school working at getting my degree so I can become an Elementary teacher.

I think that freelancing is not for everyone, but I am agree that you aren’t charging enough, i guess that if you charge more, you can work less hours a week, spend more time with your family and throw away those clients that don’t valorate your work. And John Ek is right, you need some larger clients who provide recurring work, so you will know more or less how much you will earn at the end of the month.
I’m a part time freelancer, and in a couple of month i will be a full-time (i hope so).
I hope you can resolve your situation.
Good luck

I only have one question. Does Logan have a website where he profiles his services?

There comes a point in a freelancer’s life when he/she has to make a decision: do I scale back and keep going at this alone, or is it time to grow and bring in some help?

That could actually help, believe it or not. If you hired a high school or college student to do some work for you, that would free up some time so you could work “on” the business, rather than spend so much time working “in” the business.

You are not said to be a freelancer. Good luck in the future!

Freelancing is a scary job…you don’t know where your next check is coming from sometimes. i’ve been doing it for 10 years, full time, and almost every year i contemplate going to work at a ‘real job’ just for the security of it.

it takes a while to get that good base of clients that you need to keep you on your feet and to build up a safety buffer so you don’t freak out during a slow spell. keep the faith. it takes a while to build up the clientel.

my biggest fear/problem is insurance. it keeps going up and up and up. and it’s just me. i can’t imagine having to be responsible for 2 other people too.

keep your chin up, persevere…. things have a way of working out and trust me, you’d rather be working 70 hour weeks for yourself instead of for ‘the man’.

Personally, I think this was a great, honest article. Honesty beats false cheeriness in my book any day. I don’t expect a blog writer to inspire me as much as I expect truth.

Sometimes, I think having a job gets a bad rap. I have a job. It’s 9-5. It’s not my life. It supports my life. I’m the sort of person who does well with structure. Worrying about next month’s income and not knowing my schedule for next Tuesday would drive me nuts. It would distract me from the things I want to be thinking about, like my family and friend, the projects in my knitting basket and the books on my nightstand.

I may not fit the American ideal of entrepreneurship and self-reliance, but I’m *happy*. Here’s self-reliance for you: Frack anyone who tells me what I *should* do or be.

PS. If working for the government doesn’t appeal, I work for a research center at a university and am very happy with the benefits and environment. I’ve made more in corporate jobs, but been there, done that, prefer it here.

What the?!

You’re working 100 hours and making less than a normal job! What’s your rate? Do you even track your time?

If you are working those hours constantly and not making adequate money doesn’t that make you think that maybe you are doing something wrong. Are you under estimating the time involved? Are you not understanding the clients requirements? Are you choosing troublesome clients?

It doesn’t sound like it’s freelancing that is getting you down. It is a lack of discipline and proper procedures.

I used to joke that there often wasn’t much difference between being self-employed and being unemployed.

The people who are really good at freelancing run their business like a business owner, charge what the work is really worth to the client (instead of some deflated view of what the work feels like it’s worth to the person creating it), and have the desire to keep pushing to grow the business and continually land new clients.

Some people have it, some people do not. Just because you’re unemployed doesn’t mean you’re self-employed, no matter whether you get little jobs on the side to tide you over.

The quicker you learn which type of person you are, the faster you can find the best way to earn a decent living.

Preach it.
I got laid-off from my “seasonal” position with the National Park Service in winter 2001 (was only supposed to be for the summer 2000, but kept getting extended). Decided to try my hand at freelance design (degree in Landscape Horticulture and Design has surprisingly wide-ranging applications). I worked a part-time job while doing this to make ends meet, and had not yet had a job that provided insurance. I was living with some other friends in a cheap rental house, and was well-supported socially, but I just didn’t have the confidence to go out and market myself — nor did I have a great frame of reference for what my work was worth. Lasted for about a year before I finally caved and found an office job I could walk to from home. That job sent me into certified depression, going from total freedom to being an office assistant (but my commute was unprecedented).
Just at the time I was starting to fill out grad school apps, I was offered a job that would fill all kinds of my great-job criteria. I take public transportation, but I could ride my bike (for 45 minutes and then change into professional garb). I work a 35-hour week. I get full, great benefits and, strangely, a fairly competetive salary for my field. It’s not blow-your-mind creative work, and I still sit in a daggone office for 7-8 hours a day, but for more than 4 years, it’s paid my bills and helped me feel like an actual adult that I could respect.
I have always been drawn to the freelance life — I’m a night-owl, and I have a serious problem with authority (my bosses usually aren’t too keen on having to explain why I should be in the office at the same time as everyone else, time after time), and I have great disdain for dressing professionally and dealing with office life (being nice to people who really annoy me, etc.).
However, a successful freelancer not only possesses the skill they are selling, but s/he must also be adept in business sense. This, I do not have. At all. Maybe I don’t have a great sense of survival, but I tend to turn down payment for my creative work. Maybe I haven’t been in the business long enough, or maybe I have always worked with the wrong clients, but I would prefer to avoid the whole awkard conversation about payment for creative services.
Now that I’m writing this, I’m wondering why it’s easier to negotiate a salary in a company than to charge for a job, project by project? It’s not like the quality of my work is any different — in fact, truth be told, it’s probably worse in working for a company. But the experience of asking for payment is quite a bit different.

I don’t see this as a downer… I see it as a eye-opener

The problem about the “usual experience sites” is that usually the stories tend to be only positive ones.
It’s like those “I stoped Smoking sites”… If you are shy and think you have failed to do what the site “sells” you are never going to have the guts to tell your story…

Kudos for Logan’s Courage on coming forward, kudos on this site for not beeing a rosing playground like those I mentioned.

Now… where did I put my courage to tell my experience…

There is a saying, “A lawyer who represents himself has a fool for a client.” Sometimes being your own boss can feel this way, too. You don’t sound like a fool, though, Logan, just someone who has been pushing against or struggling with the process for some time. Maybe you are fighting the wrong battle. Sounds to me like some Inner Work (you choose the path) would help you feel less burdened. Many new karate students try too hard to learn techniques by blasting at a drill with muscle power only. Eventually they learn a relaxed muscle is faster, thus able to generate more force. They learn “try softer, not harder,” and break through many self-limiting barriers. Best wishes to you!

Thanks for the comments all.

I would like to be clear that I got into this position by (I know now) undervaluing my work and never turning down a project. As I was gaining clients, I never read anything about the right way to freelance (again, because I never thought it would be my full time job) and that was my biggest error.

Also, things are slowly getting better for me. I actually got half the day off on Monday and I apparently have enough time to type this out, so I can’t be doing too bad.

@ Design ICU
“Anyone who works 100 hours a week is an idiot.”

No arguments here.

@ David Downing
“Logan, shouldn’t you at least be able to get yourself insurance, at the very least?”

Well, I think it goes without saying that if a single person were to receive insurance in my family, it would be my daughter. That’s actually happening soon, hopefully. I would appreciate it if you could email me the name of your provider. They sound great.

@James Chartrand
“Does Logan have a website where he profiles his services?”

No, I don’t. I know, it’s dumb. “Like winking at a girl in the dark” and all that. That’s another thing I’m slowly working on rectifying.

You should develop a business based on a business plan rather than go through life as a “freelance” - see freelancing to me is just someone who is basically treading water…making money here and there, when it comes around. Why not get some serious clients and build up a base of clients? Putting in all of the up front work in a business pays off years down the road, so you may be working alot in the beginning, but that will ease as you build you BUSINESS, not you ‘Freelance’ tread of water.

When you get to the point where you have good income from the business, then you can step back a bit, maybe hire out some people.

I would say start a Public Relations or Copywriting business, not be a freelancer (I do see that the site is called Freelance Switch).

Has the author ever heard of Timothy Ferriss’ book Four Hour Work Week or Robert Kiyosaki’s book Rich Dad, Poor Dad or Michael E. Gerber’s book The E-Myth Revisited?

All three of these touch on your exact issue.
If you have not read them, please do so IMMEDIATELY
before you give up on Freelancing.

Ferriss, Kiyosaki and Gerber will all tell you that a regular
job has absolutely no more security than your freelancing work.
You mentioned yourself how many times you’ve been laid off.

Now, would you rather go back to one of those prisons
with another great opportunity to be let go, or would you
rather build alternate sources of income, gain your time
back, get insurance, and play with your child?

I think the choice is obvious.
All three of those books have gotten me on my
way from being a freelance web-designer
to truly starting my own business and getting
free of any W2 with my name on it.

I’ve not got insurance.
I’ve now got more time.
I’m not FAR happier with my life.

Please read the books.
You might have to lose an extra hour of sleep
per night (which you already cannot afford to lose)
but after those exhausting evenings,
I GUARANTEE
these will change your life.

Start with Ferriss’ book.

Hi there,

Well, first of all, I do not understand why you would have no insurance at all? There are insurances for emergency situations. Shitty stuff, but at least if you are admitted to the ER and need to stay for couple days, it’ll take care of you! It’s insane to not pay ~$80 a month for that. Of course it won’t be the nice policy that a regular would get you for $400, but it’ll save you plenty of guilt in case something happens…
I read most of the comments and readers should not get scared by your article. I thought it was a nice perspective that you brought. But it’s only your story. It should not make people not jump into the freelance world.
I quit my job to finish my Master’s Degree Project. It was the kind of job where you feel like staying until midnight everyday will make your clients happier… so I quit. I did try the part-time solution, but who was I kidding, I never ended up working part-time…
I am working as a freelancer now (I don’t like the term “freelancer” by the way, I think it implies poor quality work, underpay, etc.) and I am not scared of what will happen tomorrow. No I do not work everyday. Yes, I ask for a big hour rate, but it’s still below what clients would pay for the company that I worked for before. So it is allowed to ask for that much!
I only have one client right now, but I am not really worried finding more. I already have plenty of ideas on different ways to achieve that. In fact, I spend a lot of time pushing away from my head all these ideas that I get to expend my business, get new clients, starting new businesses. I never had time to do that before with a regular job.
Anyway, I do not want to spend too much time on my story. I am not trying to tell you Logan that you’re wrong.
But I think that freelancers usually ask for too little money. I’m not sure about the other fields, but in the IT consulting field, you can go ahead and ask for the three digit hourly rate. Do your research and figure out what the consulting firms asks their clients for… Just an indication, a small consulting firm will be in the $100-$200 range, a medium firm in the $200-$300 range and a big firm in the $300-$400 range. The consulting rate is around $50. So from the ranges above, remove $50 and the amount left is called insurance. It is pretty much the insurance that clients pay the consulting firm to guarantee that their project will be completed. A small firm can only guarantee for $100 because they have less resources than the big firm that can guarantee the completion of the project for $300…
So when you establish your hourly rate, you should determine what your consulting price will be (and that can be the same as any consulting firm) and also determine your insurance (less than the consulting firms). But you also have to add a certain margin to reach your freelance goals. Clients know who they have to deal with. There are advantages for clients to contract with freelancers (no hierarchy crap, no politics crap, easily reached, etc.) and you should charge them for it! Don’t lower your rate because you think that if you were your own client you would blah blah blah… then that’s the wrong client and move on to the next one that will be ready to pay for your services. Let me tell you, if you get paid well, you’ll work better!
BTW Logan, I’m not an American but I am definitely not un-American…:)

Emmi

Gee,
I think to get those of worker payment, insurance and such you need to be smart. I don’t really know the situation on your country, but i knew it for sure that it will be the same all over the world that you should keep your money and start your own campaign for steady monthly income. As for me, i invest them to a non techno business that exists in our part of life. You could mention a lot of them. Although i’m just starting out but if the plan works well it could surpass your amount of earning in a month by doing freelance works. So i think make this freelance works as your hobby and soon you will be surprised that you can have more time to spend to do anything you liked. Just a small note, i’m working for online and offline clients and planning to have a research type office work for monthly income (”you can getinsurance freely doing this”) and guess what, i still have more time to spend and enjoy. If i feel i don’t like working then i just stop and enjoy the whole day doing funny thing.

This article reminds me why the worst freelancers become so hardened and it explains how others go on to get their “recurring” paydays. Getting recurring gigs is not that difficult, if you do the job right the first time and deliver on-time, chances are that client will come back. Doing a gig right requires you know best practices for your craft and are focused enough to deliver as expected. However, if you moan and complain about your personal problems while doing the job, the client will most likely perceive you as a basket-case, not that the writer of this article is one, but clients are odd like that. Some clients would love to talk about my personal life all day — not gonna happen. Enough of the rant, as this article is meant for us and not for our clients. Regardless, within that framework of keeping “your life” to yourself, try not to have the personality of a cardboard box either. The key gem to take from this article is the “Acres of Diamonds” concept that Russell Herman Conwell (founder of Temple University) learned from an Arab guide,”…about a man who wanted to find diamonds so badly that he sold his property and went off in futile search for them; the new owner of his home discovered that a rich diamond mine was located right there on the property.” So as the wiki on him goes onto say “dig in your own back-yard!” and I’ll add, “with your daughter beside you helping you dig.”

The key gem to take from this article is the “Acres of Diamonds” concept that Russell Herman Conwell (founder of Temple University) learned from an Arab guide,”…about a man who wanted to find diamonds so badly that he sold his property and went off in futile search for them; the new owner of his home discovered that a rich diamond mine was located right there on the property.” So as the wiki on him goes onto say “dig in your own back-yard!” and I’ll add, “with your daughter beside you helping you dig.”

Life is too short to do something that makes you this miserable! Freelancing isn’t for everyone, and you have nothing to prove. Save your sanity and get a job, agree with the above poster that a government job is a great option especially if you are concerned about health care for your family and generous time off to be with your daughter.

I’d say I was 75% through the article and was sure this was a downer, and was sure it was a depressing article, when suddenly it was resurrected by your last paragraph or so. I ended up feeling a breath of fresh air as it really provided a realistic - which mean sometimes harsh - view of life as a freelancer. It definitely didn’t end like it started and provided much in terms of onward looking and future goals.

Best of luck with your freelance career. Great post.